Ya know, some years, ya just don’t quite have it all together 😆 Some years you don’t even think about Halloween until your kid’s bus driver gets off the bus dressed as a Crayola Crayon and you think, “Hm… why is she dressed as a …. Faaacckkkk!!! He was supposed to wear a costume today.” Then, to squash your... Continue Reading →
And Just Like That… Life Begins Again.
I am not a person who holds center well. I experience this life with an, honestly, exhausting level of intensity. At this point, for me, dispassion is an unattainable philosophical concept, far outside my reach. And although I’ve developed the ability to see the highs and lows coming, when I am in the midst of them, they are... Continue Reading →
What Has your Child Taught You?
It would probably be much easier to write about the few things that Oliver has not taught me in our time together because the list of his lessons shared, could go on forever. Without speaking a word, Oliver has imparted more wisdom to me than any other person on earth. I consider him to be my greatest teacher. But... Continue Reading →
The Secret World of Non-Verbal Communication
For me, the strangest part of having a non-verbal child, is not really knowing who they are and what they think. Sure, on many levels, I do know Oliver. But as his little brother Nicco grows up before my eyes and I hear the speech that flows from him so naturally, it reawakens the burning questions slumbering in... Continue Reading →
Peeling the Onion
It has been said that the grieving process is like peeling an onion. As each layer falls away, it gives the gift of deeper understanding and also reveals the next level of processing. The stages don’t go smoothly from 1-5… denial, anger, bargaining, depression and then acceptance. They are interwoven and revisit you many times even after... Continue Reading →
Simple Joys
Hot showers have always been one of my most favorite things in the whole world. When I’m tired, sick, stressed, worried, sleepy or wound up… a hot shower is always the cure to my ails. I love the calming caress of the water as it falls over my shoulders, melting away the tension and easing my worried... Continue Reading →
Stolen Glances
Before I had Oliver, I was very uncomfortable around people with disabilities. It’s kind of embarrassing to be honest about that, especially at this point in my life, but I wanted to open this conversation up because I don’t think I am the only one who’s felt that way. Often when I am out in the... Continue Reading →
Mom’s Day Out
Last weekend I was lucky enough to spend some high quality bonding time with the best bestie in the whole world, Lynn. Our friendship has lasted over 20 years, surviving geographic separations, differing life paths, and personal change. It has truly stood the test of time and remains one of the deepest friendships I believe I... Continue Reading →
The Alchemy of Experience
Sometimes I barely recognize the person I’ve become. I took this photo just before walking in to confront our respite agency about why they aren’t staffing our hours with competent caregivers. Five years ago I never could’ve imagined dressing in this conservative outfit and coolly and confidently walking into an office to deal with an... Continue Reading →
The Tiger that Lurks in the Shadows
As many children with Cerebral Palsy do, Oliver also has epilepsy. He doesn't have very many seizures but when he does have one, it doesn't stop on its own. Although we have rescue medication that we carry with us at all times, it has never actually worked. So we are left with only the choice to... Continue Reading →
Motherhood, To Me…
Simple and Complex, together. A never-ending quest for evolution. The peeling of an onion revealing every shadow part of oneself. A marathon of tasks and duties, so much so you hardly notice the weeks, then months, then years flying by. An opportunity to become the very best version of You. A call to self-reflect and improve. Also, to... Continue Reading →
BURNOUT
I’ve felt this coming for a couple months now… I rely on coffee to bring my body to life every morning and wine to force it to keep going each night, far beyond when it begs me to rest. My diet consists of whatever is closest, easiest and quickest to grab which often means pretty much... Continue Reading →