My tiny little angel with a great big heart and deep knowing eyes … today we celebrate the 5th anniversary of our Birthing Day. The moment that you dipped your toes into this world, and then pulled them back, not quite sure if you wanted to stay. I’m so glad you did. ❤
I know that the world will forever see in you the limitations of your physical form, but what I see in you is the pure and endless love that emanates from the depths of your Soul.
From those first breathless minutes, holding your still blue body in my arms, you’ve been my guide on this epic journey through Life. And each year has held a different lesson.
In the first year, you taught me to survive. You illuminated all the ways I’d need to grow to be your mother and to be the woman I was meant to be. But in that year, I was not ready. In fact, I did everything I could to run from the wisdom flowing from those big brown eyes. But you didn’t give up on me.
In year two, you taught me to reach out. You needed so much of me and I needed to learn to open up, to trust again and to allow love back into our lives. You lead me to my tribe and fostered the growth of friendships that will last a lifetime.
In year three, you awakened in me the heart of a warrior. You directed me to a strength I never knew I had and demanded that I stand tall in the face of unbelievable adversity. When the walls were crumbling around me, you demanded that I lean into that opportunity for growth and continue fighting for the life we deserved.
In year four, you lead me back to Hope. This year, things began to fall into place. You showed me the power of persistence. You brought into our lives a vast network of helping hands and loving hearts. This year, we began our uphill climb to the most awe-inspiring vistas of our Odyssey.
In year five, you lead me back to mySelf. You showed me a path the was beautiful beyond my wildest imaginations. Together we came full circle back to the beginning of our journey together, but this time, the lessons of survival were on the level of Spirit instead of Flesh. And this time, I was ready.
This year you showed me that I need not hold onto worry and sadness. In fact, you gave me the permission to be truly happy… to allow myself to feel joy without guilt. You showed me the necessity of caring for myself. You taught me that although there will continue to be loss and limitations and sadness, there is a love and life energy that flows through those human experiences and persists far beyond their span. This year you taught me to let go of self-imposed limitations and live life to its fullest.
My love, for me, these 5 years have not flown by like the other moms say. That just isn’t my truth. I have felt, deeply, each moment of our struggle and each day has truly been a test of strength and perseverance. But what an incredible journey it has been so far. And although I’d do anything to remove your suffering, I wouldn’t change the path we’ve walked to here, because your presence and teachings are some of greatest blessings of my life.
So Happy Birth Day my Love. Today we celebrate FIVE years of beating the odds… FIVE years of survival… FIVE years of life. Shine on my sweet soul. ❤ The world needs your big bright beautiful light ❤